She posted what?! From where?! Saying what?! Sorry, but aren’t some things supposed to be private? Today we’re asking one of the many controversial questions that surround modern day social media — how real is too real?

We’ve all been there: you’re scrolling through your feed halfheartedly, taking in the lattes and the flowers and the OOTD’s, when something out of the ordinary stops you mid-flick. Be it a particularly jarring photo of something gory or intimate, or a long-winded paragraph waxing poetic about a bad day, you’re caught off guard, suddenly forced to digest something a lot heavier than you’re used to seeing on the given medium. How do you react? One camp might say it’s a welcome change of pace — a dose of realness from the poster reaching out to their audience for moral support, and a refreshing message amongst sameness and “perfection”. The other camp might equate it to a publicity stunt — an act of self-deprecation made to draw attention.

The challenging thing about social media is that since it’s so new, there’s really no set of rules or guidelines as to what’s appropriate. Sure, something might seem to be tacky and TMI to you, but there’s no Emily Post of the digital age to back you up. And if reality television has taught us anything, it’s that exposing yourself to the public and airing out your dirty laundry pays — birth and death, intimacy and heartbreak are all fodder for entertainment. The question is, what role should you play in it all?

Personally, I tend to use social media for surface level interactions and look to in-person relationships for deeper conversations… but maybe I’m just old fashioned? Or worse, maybe I’m inauthentic and just-showing-the-good-things online. What do you think?

*featured image from Garance Doré

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Comments (8)
  1. 1
    Camille Styles July 2, 2015 at 11:02 am

    I’m with you on the dilemma — there’s a part of me that finds it refreshing when people are more “real” on social media, instead of just posting the pretty side of life. But then again, oversharing can definitely come across as a cry for attention, which totally gets on my nerves. Usually I think you can see through the thought behind the post, and if someone is being truly authentic and sharing something with good intentions, I give it a thumbs up.

  2. 2
    Jennifer Rose Smith July 2, 2015 at 11:04 am

    Great post, Chanel. I think about these things, too! My favorite friends to follow online are candid and not afraid to express their emotions — but they are rooted in a positive outlook with a healthy dose of humor. They’re also very focused on sharing the love for the people around them, and not so much self-focused thoughts and introspection. I think as a culture we’re in need of a healthy ethos in regards to social sharing. I think if we share from a place of LOVE (and not competitiveness or neediness) it can be a powerful thing.

  3. 3
    truebluemeandyou July 2, 2015 at 11:07 am

    It’s so tricky because a blogger may post about not feeling well because they’ve been sick all week with a virus, yet their reader is going through something life threatening like chemotherapy. Or another blogger blogs about her heart breaking split with her boyfriend, and yet her reader is going though a divorce. Because the internet is impersonal you never know what someone on the other end of your post is going through and how trivial your problems seem to others. I am more mindful of that now.

    My blog has become more neutral because my readers want to come for fun DIYs (what has she posted today?), but others may go to other blogs for something entirely different. A rare exception on my blog was when I recently posted about a blogger’s death. But my intention was to alert others to to this sad event and that there was a collective project being done in her honor.

    • Chanel Dror July 6, 2015 at 9:29 am

      You make a great point… everyone is fighting their own battle!

  4. 4
    Tess July 2, 2015 at 4:49 pm

    I come to your blog for fascinating features on people I’ll never meet, fabulous recipes that that make me think outside the box, and maybe most of all, a big dose of beauty, which you supply with fun and grace. In some ways, I feel like I know all of you at Camille Styles, and that is why I also appreciate the occasional posts about ‘real life’. It never feels like oversharing to me, more that you are entrusting your readers with something valuable in addition to the loveliness you supply each day. And please don’t stop confessing the times when a recipe goes wrong or a party falls a little flat or you say exactly the wrong thing. I like hearing that even you ladies miss the mark sometimes 🙂

    • Chanel Dror July 6, 2015 at 9:27 am

      Thanks for your thoughtful feedback, Tess! Glad to hear that you’re happy with what we’re putting out 🙂 And NOTED on disclosing our mishaps and bloopers… they should probably have their own series by now!

  5. 5
    Emily Toler July 4, 2015 at 12:51 am

    Seriously three cheers to you all for keeping it classy. Lately I’ve been hitting the unfollow button for no other reason then the constant ‘over share’. The birth stories, political posts and style blogs turning into personal opinion blogs are making me draw back. It’s too much! I really appreciate your content and discretion.

  6. 6
    Michelle July 10, 2015 at 2:01 pm

    This is such an interesting topic (I know I’m late to the convo). My thought is that there are enough non beautiful, imperfect things in the real world so why can’t we go somewhere and see something we know will be beautiful? That’s why I like to go to the style blogs. At the same time, I do feel more of a connection with the writer and will trust their opinion more when I know a little more about their life. Joanna Goddard does this very well.



Chanel Dror