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Camille Styles

Living Kindly

How to Make Your Resolutions Actually Work For You

January 10th, 2018

photo from dignify

Unpopular opinion: I’m not a fan of New Year’s Resolutions. Now, if you’re thinking, “That’s not Living Kindly,” let me explain.

I guarantee in the past few weeks you’ve seen advertisements or have heard: “Detox! Cleanse! New Year, New You!.” January 1st has become a bit of a commercialized holiday in the wellness and fitness industry. To me, the messages come across as inauthentic, surface-level, and cheap. Second, while I love the idea of a fresh start and working towards any goal, I’d love for you to do that when you feel ready, and that may not be on January 1st. Finally, the thought of setting one goal at the start of the year and keeping that for 365 days feels limiting. I’d like to think we’re constantly evolving and changing and what suits us in January or February may be entirely different by July.

Just pause for a moment and seriously look at how much you changed over the course of a year. Not sure about you, but the girl I was in January of 2017 is pretty different than the girl I am right now. It’s amazing how much we can evolve.

I’m a growth-orientated and self-reflective person, so I am constantly trying to learn, step outside of my comfort zone, and challenge myself creatively and professionally. Change is inevitable in my world. So what did I do when January 1st rolled around? Nothing really. I didn’t feel the pressure to “have a plan” or drastically change anything. Quite opposite to be honest. At the end of 2017, I started to meet with a therapist (more on that at another time), and put in some really solid time and work into “me.” I like what I’ve been working on and most of all, what I’ve gained from the process. The name of the game at the end of 2017 was to slow down, and I’m carrying that into 2018. I’m usually quick to fire off a text, respond with an immediate YES/NO, overcommit, and eventually run myself into the ground and get really sick. It’s been a hard practice to pause, but one that’s worth it. Not much in life — or at least in my world — requires an immediate response. And friends, this is the first time in years that I haven’t been sick in the Fall or Winter.

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5 Comments
  1. My husband and I are trying this and is actually working and fun to do with each other.https://lavish-lagniappe.com/2018/01/05/no-to-resolutions-yes-to-positive-habits/

  2. Yes to less social media and more silence. I also created a vision board for the first time this year. I’m so excited to see what comes of it. Enjoy your 2018!

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  3. Anne Elliott says:

    A few book recommendations: Love with a Chance of Drowning, The Rosie Project, The Woman in Cabin 10, & What I Was Doing While You Were Breeding.

    Similar to you, I don’t really believe in 365 day new year resolutions. I decided to try reading 1 book per week a few months ago and it’s been a wild and enriching ride.

    Happy reading!

  4. Eva says:

    Such great goals! I’ve decided that 2018 was the year I face down a lot of my fears and feelings of anxiety and self-doubt! You definitely have to push yourself out of your comfort zone, but it continues to get easier each time. I agree with you about stretching – I did an hour of Yin yoga today and box do my hips feel loose! It’s such a small thing, but taking care of your body makes a huge difference in the long run!

    http://www.shessobright.com

  5. Linda says:

    Book ideas? One to start with:
    Anthony Doerr’s “All the Light We Cannot See.”

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